Life is a series of events, and they seem to be multiplying. I’m not referring to events like loading the dishwasher or combing your hair or walking the dog. I’m talking Events – the ones with a capital E that are cause for celebration. Exclamation point. This category of Events used to be a manageable group. Birthdays. Anniversaries. Mother’s and Father’s Days and even Grandparent’s Day, if you were so inclined. They included holidays like Independence Day and the Fourth of July, which have been around practically since the beginning of our country. The first official federal holidays weren’t established until 1870. There were four of them. Seven more have been added in the last 150 years, the last being Martin Luther King, Jr. Day added in 1983. The federal government may have thus far held the national holiday cap at 11, but that doesn’t stop the rest of us from creating our own. This became evident during the crescendo leading up to my daughter’s wedding last summer. I used to think of a wedding as a celebration, but I now know I was selling myself short. A wedding is not just one Event. It is many. It is a celebration of celebrations. A pandemonium of parties. In a good way. Mostly. When my husband and I got engaged, he presented me with a ring and a question. I gave him an answer and that was that. He didn’t organize an elaborate, professionally choreographed dancing entourage made up of a few hundred of our closest friends to help him with his proposal. He didn’t hire a sky writer or plan a catered party to commemorate the day. He didn’t pop the question via a note on a boat with a goat while floating in a moat. He just asked and I answered. It was a moment shared by the two of us. I don’t remember feeling the least bit slighted. Although truth be told, goat ownership is on my bucket list. That was back before engagements were full-fledged Events. And I haven’t even touched on weddings, which are like engagements on steroids. Event mayhem. Weddings are only the beginning. Today, we tend to supersize the goings-on going on around us. A new baby has always been a cause for celebration. Except now we have parties to reveal the gender. We videotape a baby announcement and upload it, hoping it goes viral. New fathers present new mothers with “push presents” because apparently pushing out a baby isn’t enough of gift. Or it is, but something extra is always appreciated. (I’m still waiting for my push presents.) People are even creating Events around typically unpleasant situations. Divorce parties celebrate the end of a marriage or wedding rewind. Some people have posh affairs complete with a gift registry, a moving-on ceremony, caterer and music. (Dance like you’re single – because you are!) According to the National Day Calendar website, there are over 1,200 national days – not actual holidays – designated as celebrations of something or other. If you do the math, this leaves us with more than three events to celebrate on any given day. All. Year. Long. We recently celebrated National Hug a Sheep Day and National Bobblehead Day. I’m still shaking my head in disbelief about that one. Upcoming in the next few weeks are Plan your Epitaph Day (otherwise known as National Preparedness Day or Dooms Day.) Coincidentally, National Cappuccino Day and Harvey Wallbanger Day fall within the same 24-hour period, so I guess we’ll have to make a beverage choice. Either that or do a lot of drinking. Have a Bad Day Day is followed by Absurdity Day, which was created as a day to recall and note some of the totally and absolutely absurd things in history, in our country and in our lives. Given the current political climate, that shouldn’t be too difficult. Don’t get me wrong. I love a good celebration. Party like it’s National Carbonated Beverage with Caffeine Day, because it is! I can and will celebrate like its National Square Dance Day or even National Waiting for the Barbarians Day. But I’ll do so in moderation. National Moderation Day – now there’s an Event I could embrace. And I would. If it existed. It doesn’t. At least not yet. Give it time. (National Patience Day will be here in about a week.) Jill Pertler is an award-winning syndicated columnist, published playwright, author and member of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists. Don’t miss a slice; follow the Slices of Life page on Facebook.